Reason to SMILE #230: KIDISMS VOLUME 5
In honor of my younger son’s twelfth birthday, I present to you Alex’s Greatest Hits:
3 years old: Clean Up Time
Me: OK, Alex. It’s time to pick up your toys. I’m going to count down from ten and you see if you can pick up all your toys before I’m done counting.
Alex: How ’bout I count and you pick ’em up?
4 years old: Rock, Paper, Scissors
Alex and his older brother, Corey, were playing Rock, Paper, Scissors. Corey pounds his fist on his other hand while he says,” Rock, Paper, Scissors, shoot!” On “shoot”, Corey forms scissors with his hand and Alex — well, he makes a gun with his fingers and says, “Ha! Ha! I shot your scissors. I win!”
6 years old: The Lord’s Supper
The congregation was sitting in quiet reverence of the observance of the Lord’s Supper. The Pastor raises the cup and says, “This is filled with juice but we know it represents the blood of Jesus…So as we drink this cup…”
Alex sits up and loudly announce: “I’m not drinking that!”
7 years old: The Fog
The drive to school was eerie due to a dense fog that covered everything. Visibility was at a minimum and as we neared Corey’s school, the fog was so thick that you could not even see the school building.
“Look, Alex!” I said. “Corey’s school is gone!”
From behind me, I heard an evil little laugh erupting. “Bahahahaha! One down – one
million to go!”
8 years old: Spanish 101
Corey: Usted esta aburrido! That means, “You’re boring,” Alex.
Alex: You’re a burrito!!
End of lesson.
9 years old: Pizza
Alex opens up a box of pizza and sings “Aaaaaaaah” in his best angelic voice.
He closes the box and opens it again. “Aaaaaaaah,” he sings.
“It would be cool if it did that every time you opened the box, wouldn’t it? I wish there was an app for that!”
10 years old: Trust Issues
Corey: What did you see at the College Fair?
Alex: A dead dog’s heart.
Corey: Was there a live dog’s heart?
Alex: No. It has to be dead.
Corey: Then you just saw a dog’s heart.
Alex: The veterinarian told us it was dead.
Corey: You can’t always trust a veterinarian.
Alex: Yeah! Because they take out dog’s hearts!
11 years old: European History
While studying for a social studies test, I asked Alex what countries France colonized. He thought for quite a while so I decided to give him a hint.
“One is right above us,” I said as I raised my hand to point upward.
To that, Alex replied, “Mom, France did not colonize heaven!”
Alex: On Growing Up
“I don’t get why my voice is cracking!” Alex complained.
“Because your voice is changing,” I replied.
“But my voice has already changed. Is it going to change again?!? It’s like God changed it and then said, ‘No, I don’t like that one. Let’s try another one.’ ”
Poor thing! 😝
Although you may not be able to fully appreciate these SMILE moments, I thank God for every single one. Being this kid’s mom is a blessing from God. There’s no one like my Alex, that’s for sure! He’s given me twelve years of SMILES and I’m sure there are many more to come.